The grief myth: it doesn’t come in stages or follow a checklist – like love, it endures

I thought when someone was bereaved it was the first couple of months and then everything was okay again. I was so naive. It is so different.

When I met Ella, it had been ten years since her father had died by suicide. She was 17 at the time, repeating important school exams. Although her parents had separated when she was young and contact with her father had been limited, they had started rebuilding their relationship.

She described that period as a happy one: her father was making more effort, both parents had new partners, and things…

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