Comfort them or let them tough it out? How parents shape a child’s pain response

By Joshua Pate, Senior Lecturer in Physiotherapy, University of Technology Sydney

It happens in slow motion. Your six-year-old daughter is sprinting across the playground at school drop-off time when her toe catches on uneven ground. She goes down hard.

The playground goes silent. She freezes and looks up, straight at you. In that split second she scans your face for data. Should she be terrified?

I’ve been there. I’d like to tell you that my pain scientist brain kicks in immediately. But honestly it’s usually my panicked parent brain that gets there first. My stomach drops and my instinct is to gasp, or rush in to fix it.

This reaction is…

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